Kayla Ybanez Blog

NLP & Online Coaching with Kara Fillion

Mar 23, 2020

What is NLP?

Neuro Linguistic Programing

Neuro  - how we use our nervous system and mind to experience the world through our senses

Linguistic - how we use language and how we give it meaning 

Programming - the patterns and strategies and how we use these in our day to day life.

This means is that NLP is learning to communicate with your mind and achieve the results that you want

We have 60-80 thousand thoughts everyday and 95% are subconscious - you don’t even realise that you’re thinking them. A lot of the time we have limiting beliefs and patterns and programmings that we’re not even aware we’re doing. 

It’s good for anyone who wants to be a better leader, wants to make more impact, wants to be a more powerful leader, better presenter, especially coaches, or industry leaders. 

Kara uses this to develop her own style of coaching and by being familiar with NLP, she is able to help her clients get transformations quickly! Top industry leader Tony Robbins also uses NLP to get his clients instant transformations.

It all comes down to mindset - something we’ve all heard over and over again. 

If you don’t believe you can, then you’re never going to get there. 

Before becoming NLP certified, Kara had her own limiting beliefs holding her back, believing that “English is my second language so I can never be a good coach.” 

We all have limiting beliefs, and a lot of the time we can’t explain where they have come from - Kara included. 

Her mission with her clients is to allow them to overcome their limiting beliefs and help them build an internal representation of themselves so their external representation can reflect.

Kara introduces The Formula for Success, which can be used for anything that you do in your life, not just in business. It’s the formula for Cause and Effect. 

Can you approach a situation by being at cause or you can approach a situation by being at effect.

Cause gives you results:

What can I do to be at cause for my own results? This means, taking responsibility for your own success, taking responsibility for anything that is going on in your life and choosing to take action on that. Ask yourself what can I do to change that? Can I change messaging? Can I put in more effort? Can I hire a coach? 

Effect gives you reason. 

This means, finding reasons why things aren’t going in your favour, why you’re not making the money you want to make, or you’re not attracting the clients you want to attract and attaching excuses to that, such as I'm not good enough, or they’re not the right client, ect.

By switching your perception on whatever is going on right now, you are responsible for creating change!

Imagine your mind is like a thermostat, you can program in two ways. 

If you program your mind to think that you’re only going to make $50,000 dollars a year or the max amount of money you’ll ever make a month is $5,000, or working a 9-5 is the only thing for the rest of your life then that is exactly what is going to happen. 

Or, you can adjust the thermostat in your mind to say, I’m a powerhouse who’s going to have consistent $10,000 months, who’s going to have a six-figure salary, who’s going to be her own boss, then you shift your thoughts to believe that. Your subconscious mind is going to shift without you even knowing and then, next thing you know, you’re going to be that person. 

Your internal representation is your external reality. 

Kara’s fave NLP techniques:

Anchoring - being able to trigger an emotion at any time.

If you’re in business and you’re someone who does sales calls, what if you could trigger confidence, or excitement every time you’re about to get on a sales call instead of stress or anxiety or “ugh, i need to close this client.” 

What if instead you can trigger, confidence, gratitude, abundance - that’s what you can do with anchoring. 

You find an external trigger, for example your knuckle or a point behind your ear, and everytime you feel that emotion you make it stronger. 

So you can close your eyes and imagine a time where you felt extremely confident or extremely grateful and really feel that emotion. When you get to the peak of that emotion you want to press on your trigger point, either your knuckle or behind your ear or somewhere that you don’t touch often so that when you do your emotions are going to trigger. 

Everytime you feel that emotion you touch that point for 3 seconds and it’s going to get stronger and stronger every time. So that you can be confident or grateful or abundant anytime you need to be - which is pretty incredible. 

Re-framing - taking a situation and giving the client different ways to look at it. This is a really powerful tool to use as a coach. 

Say you’re a relationship coach and one of your clients comes to you devastated that she’s going through a divorce. Through the technique of re-framing you ask, what if this relationship was toxic for you or holding you back, stopping you from reaching your full potential? 

Therefore, you take them from a sad and hopeless perspective and help them get out of the emotions they’re in. Helping them see the rainbow when they’re in a difficult situation by asking powerful questions of your clients. Especially when they come to you with the ups and downs of the entrepreneur journey.

“Life isn’t happening to you, it’s happening for you”. 

Building rapport - is matching and mirroring the people you’re speaking to. Matching their physiology, toning, words, even their posture. You match to build a bond with them.

You want to do this with any potential client, with your audience, or in many areas of your life. You wouldn’t buy something from someone you don’t like and we tend to like people who are like us. 

For example, if you’re on a discovery call with someone and they have a really soft, slow voice, you don’t want to be loud, fast and in their face because you’ll scare them off. So you basically want to be like them. Meeting them where they are. 

Even something shaking their arm you want to subtly shake your arm too because it creates a sort of bonding effect between you both.

There are so many more NLP techniques, but these are the easiest techniques to apply RIGHT NOW. 

Kayla Ybanez is a top industry business coach, international public speaker, and founder of The Modes Project and Ybanez Media. Kayla says goodbye to outdated strategies like icky “hey girl” cold messages and HELLO to changing societal norms about the Network Marketing industry.


Kayla Ybanez is a top industry business coach, international public speaker, and founder of The Modes Project and Ybanez Media. Kayla says goodbye to outdated strategies like icky “hey girl” cold messages and HELLO to changing societal norms about the Network Marketing industry.